I remember Jerry Seinfeld once spoke about the male tendency to wear clothing, particularly underwear until nothing remained. I’d argue that it isn’t restricted to men, but that would be the kettle calling the urn fashionable chrome.¬†For the last month or so I’ve been wearing what used to be known as pyjama pants. Somewhere along the line they failed to be. It started with a small rip at the top of the seam in the middle of the back elastic. Since then, and with a few spectacular sounding mis-placings of my foot, the rip was stretched all the way down to the back of my left knee. What is frightening is there was a time when I didn’t know this was happening and proceeded to wear them unaware of my indecent exposure. Since then I’ve taken to wearing underwear under my pyjama pants¬†(no matter what Amy tries to tell you, this is <i>not</i> typical human behaviour)¬†to protect the eyes of unexpecting lasses, so the pyjama pants serving a more superficial duty, much like a diplomatic outpost. As I noted getting out of the shower tonight, with so much cotton flapping and flailing my behind looks like a harpooned whale making one last dramatic attempt at cap-sizing the boat.¬†I think I’ll buy some new pyjamas.¬†
Please tell me you haven’t been wearing pyjama pants out in public. That would only be slightly less humiliating than wearing those horrid “happy pants” that were all the rage a few years back (my brother, the fat bastard, would wear only those for a long time).
Wearing pyjama pants in public has a slight “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest” vibe about it :)
Well Tyson you have previously bleated about the fact that you run your blurters (undies) into the ground till they are thread bare so i’m not convinced they are going to save your modesty .. just go to Wollies and get a five pack for ten dollars!!
For God’s sake man! Get thee some new jammies! People will be thinking you’re homeless!
Kevin – Not in public, though people often remark that my ‘outside clothes’ look like pyjamas.
James – Now where’s that water bubbler, Nurse Ratchett?
Tammy – Even better, at the Asian Grocery Store just down from your old place they have a bin of kids undies, 50 cents each. They’ll stretch!
Steph – And I’ll tell them it’s my CHOICE to be sleeping at the base of their driveway.